SENSELESS SURVEY
page one



 
OK, here are the rules for the ASVS FUQ SENSELESS SURVEY. Thanks
to Strowbridge for his help.

1.) When you FUQ someone you give them a Virtual Description, or
VD for short.

2.) You can only FUQ someone after you have been FUQed yourself.
This should be obvious; how can you give someone a VD when you
don't have one?

3.) The only exception is Me, the Supreme Lord of Unasked
Trivialities. Or S.L.U.T. for short.

4.) Entries due a week from now.

5.) If the person FUQed refuses to FUQ someone else, I will start
it over with another person.

Here's the list:

Question #1.) Subject's Name

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
with sticks.)

Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
the almighty Wong?

Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
of a Human Being?

Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
a dead crab?

Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
would win?


And here is my entry.

Question #1.) Subject's Name

Jonathan Boyd

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

16, I assume

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

17

Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
with sticks.)

Male?

Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

Approximately one year and two months, I believe.

Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

Likely.

Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
the almighty Wong?

Sometimes. Heathen!

Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
of a Human Being?

Yes

Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
a dead crab?

Yes

Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

Not yet

Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
would win?

No.


Boyd, your go. You have to FUQ someone else. Who, I'd imagine, is
going to be Kynes.

 
Subject: Re: [FUQ] Senseless survey
From: Jonathan Boyd 
Date: Thu, 01 Jun 2000 23:55:16 +0100
Newsgroups: alt.startrek.vs.starwars


Our spies intercepted the following article from Rob Dalton at
daltonatorNOdaSPAM@hotmail.com.invalid:

> OK, here are the rules for the ASVS FUQ SENSELESS SURVEY. Thanks
> to Strowbridge for his help.

> 1.) When you FUQ someone you give them a Virtual Description, or
> VD for short.

> 2.) You can only FUQ someone after you have been FUQed yourself.
> This should be obvious; how can you give someone a VD when you
> don't have one?

> 3.) The only exception is Me, the Supreme Lord of Unasked
> Trivialities. Or S.L.U.T. for short.

> 4.) Entries due a week from now.

> 5.) If the person FUQed refuses to FUQ someone else, I will start
> it over with another person.

> Here's the list:

> Question #1.) Subject's Name

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

> Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
> 'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
> with sticks.)

> Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

> Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
> pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

> Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> the almighty Wong?

> Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
> of a Human Being?

> Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
> a dead crab?

> Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

> Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
> would win?

> And here is my entry.

> Question #1.) Subject's Name

> Jonathan Boyd

Wow. You spelt it right.

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

> 16, I assume

18 in 2 months actually.

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

> 17

Debatable. Some say 1, some say 100, some say none at all.

> Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
> 'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
> with sticks.)

> Male?

"?" - ?!?!?!

> Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

> Approximately one year and two months, I believe.

Since January 1999 actually. The oldest post on my current computer is form
April, but I started back in January.

> Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
> pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

> Likely.

No.

> Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> the almighty Wong?

> Sometimes. Heathen!

Wong's an ass if he doesn't reply to my reply to his reply to my mail.

> Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
> of a Human Being?

> Yes

I take offence at that (don't forget to take a drink, those of you playing
along with Chuck).

> Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
> a dead crab?

> Yes



> Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

> Not yet

Hmm. Good thing? Bad thing?

> Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
> would win?

> No.

So Star Trek winning is the intelligent answer? Why thank you Rob :^)

> Boyd, your go. You have to FUQ someone else. Who, I'd imagine, is
> going to be Kynes.

Hmm. Maybe, maybe not...

... ww, what the heck.

> Question #1.) Subject's Name

Ian "Liet Kynes Highwind" Samuel

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

16

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

Variable (Don't press me on this :^)

> Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write 'None,' 'Yes
> Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten with sticks.)

Asexual? For we a know, he (it?) reproduces via binary fission. No-one's
ever actually met him (it) have they?

> Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

Since end of 98/start of 99 ?

> Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
> pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

I don't want to know.

> Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> the almighty Wong?

Being agnostic, he isnn't sure if Go- Wong exists.

> Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
> of a Human Being?

Define human. Well data got in, so I guess I'll let Kynes in as well.

> Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
> a dead crab?

He defines the condition.

> Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

Yes, but not for the usual reasons :^)

> Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
> would win?

No. There are other factors involved which led me to that conclusion.

-- 
Jonathan
AIM: BoydClone | STvsSW website: http://www.jboyd.co.uk/index.html

Your eyes are weary from staring at the CRT. You feel sleepy. Notice how
restful it is to watch the cursor blink. Close your eyes. The opinions
stated above are yours. You cannot imagine why you ever felt otherwise.

 
"Jonathan Boyd"  wrote in message news:B55CA832.10581%jonathan@jboyd.co.uk...

> > Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write 'None,' 'Yes
> > Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten with sticks.)
>
> Asexual? For we a know, he (it?) reproduces via binary fission. No-one's
> ever actually met him (it) have they?

I think someone's projecting again.

> > Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS
>
> Since end of 98/start of 99 ?

Ha ha ha. You are so wrong. As always.

> > Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> > the almighty Wong?
>
> Being agnostic, he isnn't sure if Go- Wong exists.

At least Mike has the courtesy to answer my e-mails. I've yet to receive any
comment from "God" about my new ship sizes chart (which Mike said was "pretty
damn funny.")

Now on to mine:

Question #1.) Subject's Name

Spyda, The Giant Stupid Homo

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

Pre-pubescent

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

Pre-teething

Question #3.) Subject's Sex

I would like to take the time here to point out that Spyda's website is lame.

Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

The arrival of such a small, unremarkable poster did not attract my attention.
Might well be a week.

Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

Also, I would like to point out that I could beat his sorry ass at Starcraft any
day of the week.

Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
the almighty Wong?

Who knows? I haven't exactly done a lot of research.

Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
of a Human Being?

He shows all the characteristics of being a rectal itch.

Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
a dead crab?

Crystal-clear.

Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

Nobody should award this guy for anything. Least of all for being any sort of
git.

Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
would win?

No, he's just ugly and lame. Well, actually, stupid as well, yes.
--
-LK!
[ kynes@choam.org ] [ ICQ: 795238  ] [ AIM: Kynes23 ]

"Discussions which lack moral or normative assessments are rarely interesting."
  - Emily Cuatto

 
Kynes wrote:

Ohhhhh someone's getting pissy. This was all because of what I wrote about
you on spacebattles.com isn't it? 

Way to prove me wrong Kynes 


> Question #1.) Subject's Name
> 
> Spyda, The Giant Stupid Homo

Now that's just mean. It is very very mean. For the record, I'm not gay, nor
am I stupid. 
 
> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically
> 
> Pre-pubescent

I'm actually 18. Not that I'd expect you to be able to count past 10 with
both shoes on.
 
> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally
> 
> Pre-teething

I actually feel as though I'm more aware of what's going on around me than
some others. I have quite an analytical nature. So I'd say that would make me
older than my physical age.
 
> Question #3.) Subject's Sex
> 
> I would like to take the time here to point out that Spyda's website is lame.

You get that when it hasn't been updated within 4 months. Everyone's entitled
to their opinion. 

Incidentally yours is complete dog shit.
 
> Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS
> 
> The arrival of such a small, unremarkable poster did not attract my attention.
> Might well be a week.
>
> Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
> pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?
> 
> Also, I would like to point out that I could beat his sorry ass at Starcraft any
> day of the week.

The only way you could possibly have come to that conclusion is by typing
/stats spyda on battle.net. Incidentally I'd like to see you fight
Overwind[Nano] 30 times in a row and see how good your stats are.

But then again I never will as Starcraft is probably a bit above you. Stick
to Barney's playland or whatever it is you do while not passing slanderous
comments off as actual debate.
 
> Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> the almighty Wong?
> 
> Who knows? I haven't exactly done a lot of research.

Well not really
 
> Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
> of a Human Being?
> 
> He shows all the characteristics of being a rectal itch.

Might I remind all the ladies and gentlemen reading this post that this was
all brought on because I told him he was a fanboy. Obviously I hit a nerve.

> Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
> a dead crab?
> 
> Crystal-clear.

I can think of something I don't have in common with a dead crab, I haven't
spent the past 8 hours being fucked in the rectum by one Ian (Liet Kynes)
Samuel).
 
> Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?
> 
> Nobody should award this guy for anything. Least of all for being any sort of
> git.

You say the sweetest things sometimes, :)
 
> Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
> would win?
> 
> No, he's just ugly and lame. Well, actually, stupid as well, yes.

This coming from the guy that once stated
"They have opposite charges, so they'll repel each other!"


Great, my turn.


> > Question #1.) Subject's Name

Chuck

> > Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

I dunno, 40ish?

> > Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

40ish? I dunno, I have to meet someone in person to figure that out, people
act differently when they have time to think about what they say before
hitting the send button. Incidentally, Kynes may want to make better use of
that time in the future.

> > Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write 'None,' 'Yes
> > Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten with sticks.)

Male

> > Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

God knows, well he does! 

> > Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
> > pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

I doubt it, he'd probably let the pickle drown with the man and the dog.

> > Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> > the almighty Wong?

I'm going out on a limb here but probably not, being a minister and all.

> > Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
> > of a Human Being?

Unlike some others here, yes.

> > Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
> > a dead crab?

Nope, he's a good poster.

> > Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?
> 

Nope.

> > Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
> > would win?
 
No, Starwars is a good choice. This is a debate, not a lifestyle choice. I
know I could debate either way, infact in the past I have.


-- 
                       _    _     _    _
                       \\   \\   //   //  Alone in the darkness... 
                        \\  ||   ||  //        
_                        \\ \\   // //
 |________________________\\ \\_// //_____________________________
 |    ____________________ \\/   \// ____________________________/
 |ICQ#: 39921647          /_\     /_\ http://www.nano.dk/~spyda /
 |_______________________// |     | \\_________________________/
_|                      // /|     |\ \\
                       // //|     |\\ \\
                      // //  \___/  \\ \\ 
                        //           \\

 
"Spyda"  wrote in message
news:39372CB0.20C450D7@spacemoose.com...
> > > Question #1.) Subject's Name
>
> Chuck
As far as you know
>
> > > Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically
>
> I dunno, 40ish?
27.  I'm not THAT old!  Well maybe a little old.  Okay, I confess, my
eyesite's so bad I need to squint to see the end of my nose.  My joints are
so stiff I sit down and it sounds like someone munching peanut brittle.  My
hand shake so much I came three times trying to take a piss.
>
> > > Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally
>
> 40ish? I dunno, I have to meet someone in person to figure that out,
> people act differently when they have time to think about what they say before
> hitting the send button. Incidentally, Kynes may want to make better use
> of that time in the future.
My only rule is "don't post in anger".  I've only broken that once.
>
> > > Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write 'None,'
> > > 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten with sticks.)
>
> Male
Yup.
>
> > > Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS
>
> God knows, well he does!
Yes he does.  Just over a year.
>
> > > Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
> > > pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?
>
> I doubt it, he'd probably let the pickle drown with the man and the dog.
Silly Spyda, pickles don't drown.  Everyone knows they have gills.
>
> > > Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
> > > the almighty Wong?
>
> I'm going out on a limb here but probably not, being a minister and all.
True enough
>
> > > Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
> > > of a Human Being?
>
> Unlike some others here, yes.
Thanks. :-)
>
> > > Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
> > > a dead crab?
>
> Nope, he's a good poster.
"Pay to the order of Spyda..." Oh wait, better finish this later.
>
> > > Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?
> >
>
> Nope.
>
> > > Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
> > > would win?
>
> No, Starwars is a good choice. This is a debate, not a lifestyle choice. I
> know I could debate either way, infact in the past I have.

Okay, now who to choose.

Question #1.) Subject's Name

Aron Kerkhof

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

Late twenties I think

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

the same

Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
with sticks.)

Male!

Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

About thirteen months

Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

This falls under my "don't ask, don't tell" policy.

Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
the almighty Wong?

Yes

Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
of a Human Being?

Yes

Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
a dead crab?

Nope

Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

No, he's got a life the big jerk

Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
would win?

No, because he has chosen the winning side. :-)

--
Chuck
"Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but usually manages to pick
himself up, walk over or around it, and carry on." -Winston Churchill

 
On Fri, 2 Jun 2000 13:05:11 -0500, "Chuck"  wrote:

>Question #1.) Subject's Name
>
>Aron Kerkhof

Is that your final answer?

>Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically
>
>Late twenties I think

24... close enough.

>Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally
>
>the same

Yeah, I'm just getting in that age to where I start to think, "You
know what, I *don't* know everything."

>Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
>'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
>with sticks.)
>
>Male!

Affirm.

>Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS
>
>About thirteen months

First post = 5/8/99.  Spot on.

>Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
>pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?
>
>This falls under my "don't ask, don't tell" policy.

Actually, as a rule, I do not dream at all.  Maybe once or twice a
year that I can remember.  But so far never about food products.

>Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
>the almighty Wong?
>
>Yes

Yes, although it is becoming clear that Wong (please call him Mike)
can be an angry, capricious god.  Hee hee!

>Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
>of a Human Being?
>
>Yes
>
>Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
>a dead crab?
>
>Nope
>
>Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?
>
>No, he's got a life the big jerk

If you can call it that...  Sadly, ASVS is becoming a weekend-warrior
affair for me.

>Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
>would win?
>
>No, because he has chosen the winning side. :-)

Thanks Chuck!  *kiss*  Love you too, babe.  Ok, here's mine:

Question #1.) Subject's Name

Wayne Poe

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

Late twenties to early thirties.

Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

Approx the same.

Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write
'None,' 'Yes Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. will get beaten
with sticks.)

Male

Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

He was there In The Beginning, predating the very mist of Time itself.

Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving
pickles or food products with pickles as a prime ingredient?

I don't know...  he does play with makeup, so draw your own
conclusions.

Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of
the almighty Wong?

Are you kidding me?  He's his chief prophet!  He's the Elijah to
Wong's Elisha, the John the Baptist to Mike's Jesus Christ.  All those
seeking Wong must come through Poe.  He's the voice in the wilderness
crying out "Wong is Right!"  (Ok, I guess that's Kynes right now, but
still.)

Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics
of a Human Being?

Check.

Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to
a dead crab?

Hardly.

Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

Despite the fact that he is one of the most prolific posters around,
and the fact that he has a website proclaiming it's "Ulitmate"
authority on these debates, he still knows how to party.  And he has a
girlfriend, IIRC, which raises him far above the common sci-fi nerd
status.  Not to mention his status as an Official ASVS Lump, which
confers upon him all the masculine sexiness the very name implies.  In
short, no.

Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who
would win?

Everyone loves a winner!

Aron Kerkhof
neolith.org

 
Subject: Re: [FUQ] Senseless Survey
From: Wayne Poe 
Date: Sun, 11 Jun 2000 02:17:57 -0700
Newsgroups: alt.startrek.vs.starwars



On Sat, 10 Jun 2000, Dalton wrote:

> Last chance to have your go, Wayne, before I restart it!

If I must...

> Question #1.) Subject's Name

Paul Cassidy

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Chronologically

Don't know him, can't say.

> Question #2.i) Subject's Age, Emotionally

Mid 20's.

> Question #3.) Subject's Sex (and the first person to write 'None,' 'Yes
> Please,' 'Only when they pays' etc. 
>   will get beaten with sticks.)

Male....?

> Question #4.) The time Subject has been on ASVS

Haven't a clue

> Question #5.) Does the subject have erotic dreams involving pickles or
> food products with pickles as a 
>   prime ingredient?

Ask him

> Question #6.) Does the subject believe in the divine authority of the
> almighty Wong?

Don't know.

> Question #7.) Does the subject show all the basic characteristics of a
> Human Being?

Sure.

> Question #8.) Does the subject show a clear mental inferiority to a dead
> crab?

Nope

> Question #9.) Is the subject worthy of a Sad Git Award?

Nope

> Question #10.) Is the subject stupid based on his belief of who would
> win?

Nope



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