Subject: [AAO] Luke and 7's Wedding Date: Mon, 14 Jan 2002 20:02:11 -0600 From: "Chuck, Lord of the Dance" Newsgroups: alt.startrek.vs.starwars Had Luke and Seven held a fancy wedding during Against All Odds instead of just running off like they did, how would it turn out? Dramatis Personae Darth Vader James Earl Jones Dr. Hansen Tom Arnold [Darth Vader sits alone at a table as the festivities continue] Dr. Hansen: Hey there partner! How's the father of my new son-in-law doing? Vader: [just glares at him] Dr. Hansen: Good to hear. [sits down] Hey, they told me your name's Annika too! Vader: [sighs] Anakin. Dr. Hansen: That's just an amazing coincidence. Mind if I call you Ani? Vader: Yes. Dr. Hansen: So anyway Ani, we just wanted to say thanks a bunch for this whole shindig! I mean there are species here I've never even heard of! Oh, did Annika mention I was an Exobiologist? Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: Let me tell you about it. [rambles at length] So, anyway, that's what interested me in the Vulcan sea mollusk. You ever seen one, Ani? Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: You know, I ran into your son-in-law earlier, he seemed like a nice guy. Vader: [silent] Dr. Hansen: Didn't have much to say about you though. Come on, any good stories about you and him? What kind of father-in-law is my little girl going to get, huh? Vader: Once I had him tortured just to listen to the screams. Dr. Hansen: [silent] Ha-ha, what a kidder! This guy, I'm telling ya, this guy right here! You are the life of the party, Ani. You do entertainment, 'cause if ya don't you should think about it with that sense of humor. Vader: I am the Dark Lord of the Sith. Dr. Hansen: Really? Do you have like a business card or something? Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: That's okay, Ani, I'll just look it up in the holo- directory. God, it's so great talking to you, we have so much in common. I mean, you're a cyborg, I'm a cyborg, both our kids are cyborgs; I mean, what are the chances of that! Vader: [turns away] Dr. Hansen: Love the helmet though. [hits it with a fork] What is that made of anyway? Can I try it on? Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: Aw come on! Just for a second. Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: All right. Maybe I'll see if I can pick one up. You get that at a cyborg shop or something? Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: Man, I just can't get over this. One big happy cyborg family. Did you decide to go with this lifestyle? Vader: No. Dr. Hansen: I gotta admit, neither did I. But let me tell ya, it grew on me, changed my whole outlook really. Vader: Does Annika feel the same way? Dr. Hansen: [quiet] Man, you just see right through people! You're absolutely right, there was a bit of a rift between me and her over this whole assimilation thing. [drinks] You are good. Any experience with that yourself? You've got a daughter yourself; any tension there? Vader: I blew up her entire planet. Dr. Hansen: Bing! This guy is on fire! Let me go get my brother, Murray. Murray! You've gotta hear this guy! Ani, this is Murray; he's an accountant. Tell 'em! [And thus Vader returned to the Dark Side of the Force. Because of this, Luke and Seven married in secret and spared the galaxy.] -- Chuck http://www.sfdebris.com